It’s not fair! – Aug 15

It’s not fair!

By Yosia Yusuf


I’m sure you’ve said this phrase before. Maybe more than you like to admit. This is the sort of thing you said when you know what is expected of you outweigh what you received. When the Bible commands the husband to love the wife the way Christ loved the church? It’s not fair. When the Bible told the wives to submit to her husband as the church submits to Christ? It’s not fair.


Why do we say ‘it’s not fair’ to God’s command? Have we stopped believing in the goodness of God? Or have we lost faith in the fact that God knows and wants the best for us? I doubt that’s the case. So why do we feel like His commands, especially in terms of relationship, to be not fair? A short reasoning to this question will lead us to this answer – because we do not receive what we think is our right to receive. Husbands, you feel that it’s not fair for you to love your wife the way Christ loved the church because your wife does not submit to you as church submits to Christ. Wives, you feel that it’s not fair for you to submit to your husband as church submits to Christ because your husband does not love you like Christ loved his church. Your spouse fails to live out their end of the bargain so why should you? It’s not fair! Friends, you feel that it’s not fair to forgive your brothers or sisters who betrayed you because you did your part in trusting them.


I’m not married so I may not truly understand the weight of ‘fairness’ in marriage. But I do understand the feeling of being disappointed at friend who did not keep their promises. Especially if those promises involve both party to keep their end and I keep my end very well. But can I ask you one question? Be very honest, did you keep your end of the bargain flawlessly? There is only one answer to the question because everyone is a sinner without exception.


There is only one person in the history who managed to keep their end of the bargain flawlessly. There is only one person who can truly say ‘It’s not fair’ and validate the statement. You and I cannot validate the statement as all of us fall short of what’s expected of us again and again. Yet the one who can say the phrase did not say the phrase. But rather surrender his own life and made it possible for the church to be restored and keep their end of the bargain. You and I are the recipients of this unfair love and because of it, now we are free to love others unfairly. Jesus’s love for the church enables us to love others the way we’ve been loved. When we love others the way Christ loved the church, we, the local church, show the world who Jesus is. Jesus is restoring His church!

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